As your concentration will deepen, your understanding of dhamma will deepen. As the understanding of dhamma will deepen, it will help you understand and identify deeper states of concentration, you will be more adept and skillful with concentration-samma samadhi.
Some sittings will be very very tough, may not be physically only, but also morally and mentally. You will learn to shield yourself, and wade through – impermanence is self-evident when you observe arising and passing of sensations, the sense of ‘anatta’/'not me' will also start oozing each time you sit. I sat down in the office crèche for meditation for an hour, initially sensations of cold and goose bumps (from the air cooling), then as I usually sit at home I felt I was sitting at home, then I forgot even that, mere sensations, when I got up from the sitting in exactly one hour, and moved back to my office chair, I carried a strong sense of anatta- this sensation is ‘not me’. So look, we cant predict our progress, when will an insight come and catch you unawares ;) We can only keep working. So, keep working.
I am back from a few hours sit under the bodhi tree, went last weekend. Could not still bring myself to write this post immediately after coming back, there is very little I can share about the experience. It was disrupting at first and caught me unaware, I took some time before I could calm myself down and really ‘sit’. Brought a deeper, more profound understanding of dhamma as I sat under the tree, amidst a crowd of wayfarers and an occasional meditator. I think something deep happened there, as even in my dreams I saw Buddha for a day or two after that, sensing dhamma in his presence, as if he was here teaching what is samatha.
May you be happy, may you be liberated.
Metta
