New Year Group Sitting

Foggy morning, drunk drivers and pollution. Made my way to the group retreat after walking the dog I am taking care of these days, without the much needed breakfast (all the hunger gone - I am trying to keep the precepts and don’t eat supper … though I don’t strictly stick to 'dont eat after 12 noon' routine. I was very much inclined to eat last night but contemplated on the ‘filthy’ aspects of food and could overcome, easily, though it took a while for the desire to leave completely, I dont know how to lose ;)

I think New Year is opportune time to explain ‘condensed experience’* (making up these terms, actual experience in meditation doesn’t need these ‘terms like condensed experience’). Condensed experience: Do you see how you look at the year/s gone by and pump up a resolution – the magic of condensed experience.

How it works? Well, some cleansing from looking back at the larger picture objectively. Real time, some moments of truth :) Also, you might not want to think this way right now, but this is like death, some chunk of my life gone, never to be retrieved. Just that in death All of it is gone.

You are suddenly glad for the leftovers.

I reached the meditation group sitting:
This old guy (teacher) conducted the meditation, and I sat down, and he answered some technical aspects of meditation with great ease and resolved doubts I had for some months. He approved and disapproved at right places. It was like taking your script to the editor, and let her suggest changes (my managerial editor was a ‘she’ :)

For general sharing on this forum, two lessons came up

One, meditators often feel pressed for spiritual experiences. It is funny and wrong to look for tangible benefits like glowing skin and perfect health from meditation, but people expect it anyway. So, the lesson is work for your material goals, keep your job/house/pet in good shape and be clear that only when you work with these things will there be better outcomes. Meditation does not help out there … yeah it can give you inspiration and guidance like being more moral in your life, being patient and spreading goodwill.

Second, mistakes happen. This insight was profound and has come after many many mini-insight-moments about the same thing. One of the things that happens to us, especially when we visit our family and old friends, is that they remind us of our mistakes. Now, the meditative mind will tell you to ‘let go’ of the past. Now that’s a cosmetic thing-let go. What I learnt was to take advantage of these mistake remembrances thrown into my face. These are like old untangled knots brought out. I carefully investigate – can I do something about it now. If I can do it, I will bend my back to amend. Most often though, its too late for amendments. In that case face the mistakes (not dwell on them), explore it and let it not cloud you this time (now here we use a practical tool of vendana, and remain equanimous to associated sensations on the body). Mistakes become a means to clear and uproot old sankharas, the imperfections. No guilt traps, no more!

Creating ‘Unknown’

So much of us wants to work with labels/names/identifying.

When you sit to meditate, just give space to unknown, create this space deliberately. See if you can stay there :) This will enable learning, welcoming, creating space and for once backing off from the stage of the 'doing' occupying mind

Without being open to unknown, you sit trying to tell your mind, such and such experience, or this or that…u wont come out any better, would you? (breath takes you there, an accompaniment towards unknown)

Like a plant needs room to grow, space…
So, when you sit, just sit still, creating space for unknown. Usually, we are afraid of unknown, we want to label things…

*Meditation on Nothingness