Letter to Meditator: Embrace

Revoked my decision to stay put in the lower hills.

Traveled further, and further up in the mountains till I saw horses roaming free, still lakes on mountain tops …

Sometimes we have to sit still, as the change happens all around and within us.

I was embraced by the mountains, plan didn’t go as I had charted – never does!

Fell sick, for a while - air is too clean. Pic of landing site today after I was in air for a few hours paragliding!

Lovely sunny day, as I sat alone perched 2000 m in Dhauladhar mountain range, heavy mist surrounded us for a while before we took off again hopping from mountain to mountain, I felt I had never felt more connected to Earth like that ...

Not writing much, slow connection, not much to write anyway

Metta

Had nothing to write about since my trip to Gaya, held it in my heart I guess - Gaya.


Until today I rolled down the hill - steep walk for about 20 minutes to bring me from the small village am staying in (Dhammakot) to Dalai Lama’s palace in McLeod Ganj. He was teaching there today, saw him, heard him, and chanted with him. He was surrounded by monks in robes, Tibetans young and old. I also met my old self there, from many years back, sitting in the same setting when I didn’t know Tibetan texts, didn’t know their mantras, and did not know myself much. Meditating in much the same way, without the ritual.

Once at Potala Palace, I obeyed rules! Did not even carry camera and mobile, as requested, left it in a pen stand in a nearby café and picked it on my way back – did not get to see the owner of the café but knew from previous experience that you can just leave things there…

Am going to stay put here, not going to travel any further whole of this week. Locals are just awesome and I think I think am safe in a single room hanging out on to the valley overlooking a jungle :D

Donated to monks (old wish, had been hoping for such an opportunity and felt lucky). Bought some CDs I could find earlier, will be joining group sittings twice daily and practice Yoga whole of this week, as the rest burst crackers and pollute the air.

(Away)

Letter to the Meditator: Sit Under the Bodhi Tree

As your concentration will deepen, your understanding of dhamma will deepen. As the understanding of dhamma will deepen, it will help you understand and identify deeper states of concentration, you will be more adept and skillful with concentration-samma samadhi.

Some sittings will be very very tough, may not be physically only, but also morally and mentally. You will learn to shield yourself, and wade through – impermanence is self-evident when you observe arising and passing of sensations, the sense of ‘anatta’/'not me' will also start oozing each time you sit. I sat down in the office crèche for meditation for an hour, initially sensations of cold and goose bumps (from the air cooling), then as I usually sit at home I felt I was sitting at home, then I forgot even that, mere sensations, when I got up from the sitting in exactly one hour, and moved back to my office chair, I carried a strong sense of anatta- this sensation is ‘not me’. So look, we cant predict our progress, when will an insight come and catch you unawares ;) We can only keep working. So, keep working.

I am back from a few hours sit under the bodhi tree, went last weekend. Could not still bring myself to write this post immediately after coming back, there is very little I can share about the experience. It was disrupting at first and caught me unaware, I took some time before I could calm myself down and really ‘sit’. Brought a deeper, more profound understanding of dhamma as I sat under the tree, amidst a crowd of wayfarers and an occasional meditator. I think something deep happened there, as even in my dreams I saw Buddha for a day or two after that, sensing dhamma in his presence, as if he was here teaching what is samatha.

May you be happy, may you be liberated.


Metta

What remains?

Problem was that this was my song, this was my life, this was my mistake, or this was my house.
And as you go further, you can map yourself by what is not left of ‘me’.
The world wont change, you would.

I went running today. I see, if I look back, rough times of my life I have gotten up and have gone for long sprints. Run, run run, and come back, to see I am not putting in enough. How shallow are you breathing - running will tell you - may be!

Just wanted to share that, in rough times, we need to tune up, tune in, be more aggressive, more aggressive with patience, with not putting up with nonsense, and eager to be loving, more aggressive in loving oneself!

As I ran today, stopped to stretch and bend, gather energy and run some more ... I could see the energy spill over to other people, I ran without much pride, giving out metta, instead of sweating pride in my running I ran breathing love for those around me, as much as I could!!

Long day at work-not nasty

“You might remember times when you were completely in the wrong, bad and mean, or ignorant and immoral. Might be times when your heart was pure, and good”
-Practicing Lay Person

I heard this guy say this quote above this week at the group sit. Pretty ripe, old man. He said that he learnt to live now, just learnt driving a car, and just learnt being mindful – yeah, quite a lot to say in one sentence.

What I kept learning this week (if there is a such thing ‘week’), was to recognize, to see. Earlier if I felt energy I will waste it, if I did not feel it then I will crave it …

To know things to be anicca, anatta, dukkha, to treat stuff as same, ahh to recognize this and still work, truthfully.


You know, I was coming back from work, train of thoughts lead to the same realization that had come in myriad ways - all experience to be just that, anicca.

As soon as I realize this, my body relaxed, with each breath the body could relax, breathe through the knots, let it break loose. Doing yoga it did occur that it was better to just breathe ... long way, need sati first.

It is good merits that people become skillful - memory, inclination, capacity to learn and understand Dhamma.

Joy

More than 'joy' there is a deeper rhythm

we call it joy for lack of better words